This week I’ve been working on the schedule for launching the 2nd edition of I Was In Love With a Short Man Once. This has me thinking a bit about all the “seconds” in my life – books, marriages, homes, and careers. I do seem to re-direct my life quite a bit. Am I greedy? Indecisive? Perhaps just lucky?
The reality is, the journey to the middle-aged cheap seats is peppered with U-turns, do-overs, and second chances. You can’t reach Club 50 status without experiencing a few detours. I suppose it’s all part of the journey. Life rarely turns out exactly as you plan it, even if you are an uber Virgo.
Marriages. There are lots of examples of couples who marry young and make it last for decades. Just this past weekend, on CBS Sunday Morning, I watched an interesting feature story about Pat Boone–hey, no one was more surprised than me that this was interesting!–who married his high school sweetheart at age 19, and they’re still together, sixty-two years later.
Image courtesy of Photopin: photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/35168673@N03/5558638579″>Pat Boone</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/”>(license)</a>
However, for a lot of us, including moi, marriage seems to work better the second time around. I’ve been with the Hubs now fourteen years and we’re still in it to win it. Honestly, God bless this man.
Careers. For over twenty-five years I’ve worked in the world of criminal and juvenile justice. Though I’ve switched employers and locations a time or two, I’ve focused most often on prevention of crime and delinquency. I do think the millennials are on to something in that they seem much more willing than the baby boomers to change things up in order to lead a more fulfilling and balanced life. Since 2010 I have managed to add a second career tier as a humor writer. This has been way more fun than I could have ever possibly imagined. And to prove it, I’ve got a second book coming out in August! Thank you Booktrope Publishing. Here’s a sneak peak of the cover, whatcha think?
Homes. No one is more surprised than me that the Hubs and I have a second home. Affectionately called Nutter House–cuz ya gotta name a second home–it’s become our refuge and place to get away from the craziness that is the DC metro area. In the new book I’ve included a story about Nutter House explaining how it got its name. Someday, hopefully soon, I’ll wake up to this view every morning:
What about you?
What have been the “seconds” in your life?
Cathy Chester saysJune 30, 2015 at 6:22 pm
Phew! I made it to the bottom of your comments, Ms. Popularity! It’s because your writing is so good that everyone wants to join in here….
Thrilled about your book (can’t wait to read it) and your second home. Where is it???? I’d love to have a second home, or even move south where there’s no more winter. My ideal home would be on a lake, but I’ll settle for a view of palm trees and year-round flowers.
I waited until I was 29 (while my mom was getting so nervous!) to get married. This year will be our 27 years!
Kim Dalferes saysJune 30, 2015 at 8:04 pm
LMAO – sry about the work out to get to the bottom Cathy – 🙂 My second home is on a lake! Highly recommend being by the water, it’s good for the soul. And, sounds like you waited for Mr Right – smart chica!!
Tam Warner Minton saysJune 30, 2015 at 4:08 pm
Randy and I celebrated 34 years this month! I was 21 when we married. I have no secret recipe or knowledge as to why it still works…it just does!
Kim Dalferes saysJune 30, 2015 at 8:05 pm
Well, if you figure out the secret please share with your sistas! Congrats on such a long and healthy relationship.
Mary saysJune 30, 2015 at 12:50 pm
You have me intrigued, looking forward to reading your book. I’ve been very lucky in the marriage department, we’re coming upon 29 years! Careers…that i’ve had a few!
Kim Dalferes saysJune 30, 2015 at 8:07 pm
Thx Mary, I hope the title and cover intrigue a lotta folks. So impressed with you and others here who are clocking in big numbers for years married. I can only hope to be so lucky.
Roz Warren saysJune 30, 2015 at 10:53 am
Magic Fishing Panties?? That is a FABULOUS book title. That’s going to make me smile for the rest of the day. Good cover art.
Kim Dalferes saysJune 30, 2015 at 10:56 am
LOL, Thx Roz. Kudos go out to my cover designer Lizzie Russell – she’s very talented.
Roz Warren saysJune 30, 2015 at 10:58 am
I’m writing her name down just in case.
Kim Dalferes saysJune 30, 2015 at 10:59 am
Jut let me know if and when you need to reach her and I’ll forward contact info. She’s great to work with.
Carolann saysJune 30, 2015 at 10:20 am
I’ve been married to same guy for 39 years now. Wow, just typing that still makes me say wow. I love how folks manage to remarry the same person. It’s so romantic and wonderful to hear!
Kim Dalferes saysJune 30, 2015 at 10:57 am
39 years – wow girl, that is seriously commendable.
Sherry Macdonald saysJune 30, 2015 at 10:13 am
Can’t wait to read your book! This is my second marriage. This week we will celebrate our 27th year. I love that you enjoy a second home. I am looking forward to looking out at the red rocks in Sedona someday when we can buy our second.
Kim Dalferes saysJune 30, 2015 at 10:58 am
Congrats in the wedding anniversary! And, I luv Sedona, that would be an awesome place for a 2nd home.
Marquita Herald saysJune 27, 2015 at 6:21 am
Great theme and can hardly wait for your book! I’ve had my share of second chances, but there’s one that stands out for me and that I am reminded of at this very moment, and that is that I am able to see and read your post at all. Several years ago I was diagnosed with a rare degenerative eye disease and told to make plans to deal with losing my sight because there was no cure. I pretty much refused to accept the ‘no chance’ option and ultimately located a doctor doing some pretty impressive things with experimental surgery. No question, I opted to give it a try and tada! In fact apparently I’m in a medical journal somewhere, but all I know is even today I send that doctor a Christmas card every year. 🙂
Kimba saysJune 29, 2015 at 9:33 am
Holy cow Marty – that IS a giant wonderful second chance! What a wonderful thing to celebrate each year.
Barbara Torris saysJune 26, 2015 at 7:08 pm
Second chances and u-turns…I loved that image a lot. I suppose there have been so many I could fill a book. But the fact is I loved your image of what it takes to overcome setbacks. I had always seen them as failures. I suppose that is why I love the idea that I was given a second chance and the bad period was not a failure but just a very sharp u-turn. Be well.
Kimba saysJune 29, 2015 at 9:45 am
Oh, that is such a good point: wide-swing u-turns vs sharp u-turns. My “wide swings” have actually been a little more difficult because I see the wide swings as gradual changes in direction that occur over time. We Virgos like immediate cause and effect. Sometimes it takes a little more effort to change the direction of an aircraft carrier!
Anne Louise Bannon saysJune 26, 2015 at 5:44 pm
My seconds? Oh, my second marriage – although I generally refer to it as my upgrade, Husband 2.3 (he’s been upgraded a couple times, too).
Kimba saysJune 29, 2015 at 9:51 am
LMAO! I have the 2.3 version of the Hubs myself!
kathykate saysJune 26, 2015 at 3:12 pm
Part of growing up (or growing old) is all the second chances we take advantage of. Looking forward to the new book, and someday toasting to the third!
Kimba saysJune 29, 2015 at 10:01 am
LOL Kate, LUV your enthusiasm. I do have an idea for the third book. But I gotta birth this second one first!!
Frank Montrose saysJune 26, 2015 at 12:37 pm
It is my hope that the joy that I have received in the last few moments be shared with you, the creator of these comments. Incidentally, I have been the recipient of a great deal of joy, due in large part, to my spouse of 57 years.
Kimba saysJune 29, 2015 at 10:02 am
Frank, you and Anna are my heroes and the poster-couple for how to do marriage right.
Suzie Cheel saysJune 26, 2015 at 8:59 am
I like your new coming view and that book cover is awesome, plus you new look is great. Seconds in my life are not something I focus on I discovered as i read this. I have walked many career paths and I think this one is my second art path xx
Kim Dalferes saysJune 26, 2015 at 9:32 am
Suzie, I love your art, so you glad you’ve chosen this as your second path.
CAROL CASSARA saysJune 26, 2015 at 8:50 am
The most astonishing second is my second marriage to my first husband. Oh, so much better the 2nd time around with him. Although I had to wait 27 years for that to happen and frankly, wasn’t sure I wanted it to happen. It’s an amazing second!
Kim Dalferes saysJune 26, 2015 at 9:00 am
Wow, 27 yrs between the 1st and 2nd marriage to the same guy? Carol, that is indeed quite a “second.” Would love to hear the full story here.
Carol Cassara saysJune 30, 2015 at 3:59 pm
It’s quite a satisfying one! the story, that is. Oh, and the remarriage!