Here we are in mid-June, firmly pressing into summer. The annual ritual of warming up, slowing down, and taking time off is upon us.
- Sunscreen: check.
- New summer read: check.
- I-Pod loaded with beach-themed music: check.
- Well-fitting yet comfy swim suit: Ugh. Damn.
This happens to me every year. I’ve promised myself in the winter months I’ll work out more, eat less, shed a few pounds and buy myself a new swimsuit. And, if I’m being honest, every June I look at myself in the mirror and utter; “Well that didn’t turn out so well….”
The media certainly seems to want to be helpful; at every turn I find magazines touting the miracles of the perfect bathing suit. Everyone is offering an ultra slimming; look ten pounds lighter; show off your best assets miracle suit. Just look at this sample that I came across today:
- Ladies Home Journal: “Perfect Fit; Bathing Suits for Every Body” http://www.lhj.com/style/fashion/clothing/perfect-fit-bathing-suits-for-every-body/?page=1
- Women’s Health: “The Best Swimsuits for Your Body Type” – http://www.womenshealthmag.com/style/womens-swimsuits
- Glamour: “Our Ultimate Swimsuit Issue” – http://www.glamour.com/magazine/toc/2013/04/index_20130402
I’ll give More magazine props as the publication that most earnestly tries to hit all the highlights in their “Best Swimsuits for Every Age, Size and Budget” – http://www.more.com/swimsuits-every-size-age-budget , with fifty-two pictures included!
For us middle-aged gals, how to dress for the beach, lake, or pool becomes a little bit more onerous each summer season. OK, before I get all the hate mail from the love your body – love yourself – screw everyone else crowd, I get that there are women out there who can let it all hang out. Just last week I saw a woman of about 50 at the local farmer’s market wearing a spaghetti strapped tank with no bra and she could have cared less what anyone thought of her sagging girls. To her I say, with genuine feeling and zero snarkiness:
For the rest of us in the middle-aged cheap seats, here are a few suggestions to get us through these next summer months:
10. When trying on swimsuits, take the time to try on many different styles. Your assets may have shifted a bit since last summer.
9. Accentuate the positive: a little waxing; a nice pedicure; and a great beach bag will serve you well.
8. I can’t pull off a two piece, but if you can – you go girl.
7. Wear the right size. My feeling is that your correct swimsuit size is usually at least one size larger compared to your normal size …
6. Ruffles at our age are probably not going to work. But I’m on the fence about this one. Thoughts?
5. Just say no to frumpy.
4. Coordinating cover-up; yes. Flowing moo-moo; no.
3. Similar to the LBD, when in doubt go with a black tank one piece. I also hear navy is very “in” this year. Can anyone out there pull off white? Anyone?
2. Even the flattest of middle-aged gals is gonna need some support – unless you’ve discovered a miracle cure for gravity.
And Kimba’s #1 suggestion for getting through the summer swimsuit season:
1. Wear a big floppy hat. It’s a great distraction.
How about you – are you ready for swimsuit season? Any advice for your sisters in suits?