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Kimberly Dalferes | Author

Crazy, Southern, Irish Gal, Author

How to Survive a Blizzard Vacation

January 29, 2016 by Kim Dalferes

It will come as a surprise to few that I’m not a big fan of winter. This Florida gal just doesn’t have the chops to hang out in the snow. I moved to Virginia in 1995 and 8 months out of the year I love being a Virginian. But from December through March, Mother Nature can make me downright homesick for ‘ol FLA. “Oh, but that heat!” they say. “The humidity!” they moan. Yeah, well, you don’t have to shovel humidity.

yogi berra jpeg

I’ve tried to enjoy what winter has to offer. I’ve attempted to ski – twice. Both instances ended with me in tears in the lodge. Strapping sticks to my feet and hurtling to my death turns out to not be my forte. I’ve sledded and gone tubing – both fun, both I can leave to the kiddies. I do like a nice fire (and can build one too, thank you very much Girl Scouts!) and a hot toddy, so there’s that.

I really do try to not complain about winter and the weather. There are certain things in life that require you to hitch up your big girl panties and just deal with it. Taxes, ya gotta pay your taxes. And flossing, that’s really unavoidable. Wear sunscreen, use your turn signal, and if the leftover Chinese food has turned green, throw it away. And, don’t complain about the weather.

This past week I was once again reminded that it’s January and in January it often snows. I concede that it’s pretty when it covers the ground in an inch or two of pristine whiteness. It’s like nature’s carpeting. Shoveling an inch of snow – or better yet using a snow blower to clear a driveway – isn’t so bad. But when it’s feet of snow; that is a major league fun-sucker.

Here’s a little run down of how I spent my recent blizzard “vacation”:

The Prep. Two days out I began to take heed of the dire predictions of the weather forecasters. Midday, on a Wednesday, I ventured into the conspicuous consumer wonderland that is Costco. A word to the wise: Impending snow storm + Costco = total sh*# show. Shopping at Costco on a normal day requires patience and the steady hand of a seasoned NASCAR driver. Shopping at Costco before a looming storm requires strength, agility, and a serious “lead, follow, or get the hell out of the way” mindset. Somehow I managed to acquire all the necessary survival supplies.

pizza with textmargarita with texttoilet paper with text

One Day Out. I dedicated some serious time to making soup, baking cookies, and setting up a crock pot pork roast. Because that’s what Southern girls do, we cook. I also charged all the cellphones and back-up batteries. Because that’s what Southern girls do, we talk. And, of course I stocked the liquor cabinet – yeah, I can’t really blame that one on the South. Hubs immediately tucked into the emergency stash of Oreos.

Day One: And So It Begins. Hubs & I snuggled up together, munched on cookies, and watched a movie. Considering we might be together in close quarters for a while, “Gone Girl” might not have been our best choice.

cookies with text

Day Two: And So It Continues. At daybreak it was still snowing. At this point in time we looked to have about 14 inches, with more predicted through tonight (that’s what she said). Hubs headed out to work with the neighbor guys to do a little diggin. I was more than happy to let the shoveling be a guy thing.

14 inches with text

A lull in the storm gave the Hubs an opportunity to clear away some of the accumulation. A picture is worth a thousand words, so, here ya go:

my hero with text

Day Three: The Clean Up Begins. We awoke to the sound of snow blowers. Hubs jumped out of bed and exclaimed “the other kids are already outside playing, I gotta go!” ‪#‎boysandtheirtoys

plays well with others with text

Day Four: The Big Dig Continues. The federal government shut down so the Hubs and I attempted to both work from home. This has not gone particularly well in the past.‪#‎prayforme.

Day Five: This is Getting Old. The Feds remained shut down which meant another day working from home with the Hubs. I love the Hubs, I truly do. However, I am quite certain no jury would convict me. A friend suggested we meet for lunch just to get out of the house. I feel quite confident that soup and sandwich may have saved my husband’s life.

Day Six: The New Normal. As the Hubs heads back to work, the house becomes blissfully quiet again. There’s mounds of laundry to tackle, a column to write, and a client who’s waiting for a deliverable. However, I think I’ll sit here a spell, finish this cup of coffee, and enjoy the snowy scenery. Ya know, it is kinda pretty.

So, tell me, how did you spend #blizzard2016? I would love to hear your stories.

Cheers,

Kimba

 

Filed Under: The Middle-Aged Cheap Seats Tagged With: #blizzard2016, baby boomers, blog, Booktrope, Costco, I was in love with a short man once, Kim Dalferes, Kim Dalferes Author, Kimba, Kimberly Dalferes, Magic Fishing Panties, middle-aged, southern girls, The Middle-Aged Cheap Seats, winter, women writers, writers

Comments

  1. Nathalie says

    January 31, 2016 at 7:56 pm

    Very funny! I am from Quebec Canada so I know “Blizzards”. When I was 18 years old I walked from my house to a Pub where my cousin was singing at. The temp was -40 below (-50 with the windshield factor). I don’t like winter either and the first item on my list would be the Margarita for sure. Luckily this year has been awesome in CT…only one snowfall so far. Crossing my fingers, it stays that way. I truly feel your pain Kimba!

  2. TERRY says

    January 30, 2016 at 3:28 pm

    Very funny post.. I live in prairie Saskatchewan in the middle of Canada, so winter and snow storms are so common that a Costco trip isn’t one of my ” to do’s ” . A good prairie girl has a well stocked freezer and pantry so that she could be hunkered in for weeks.. But hopefully not !! I love the Margarita bottle ( have one of those in my extra fridge too ! And do keep the cell phones charged. I did have a good laugh because I do agree.. lunch out can save a relationship !! Due to circumstances, I can’t escape the cold and head to Arizona like many of my friends, but am glad that this year is a very mild winter for us !

    • Kimba says

      January 30, 2016 at 3:42 pm

      My dear margarita twin: I can’t even imagine what a “mild” winter in Saskatchewan is like. You must be virtually patting me on the head with my lil ol 2 feet of snow. Stay warm and well-charged.

  3. Roslyn Tanner Evans says

    January 29, 2016 at 7:32 pm

    We watched the snow fall on a table on our deck in NY-Hudson Valley- It formed a beautiful cake & I kept thinking of taking a photo but since I often snickered at others, never did. When the 16 inches melted I was sorry I had not. I’m often glued to my desk or beading table & so these housebound days felt normal. Wish I had a story to tell. All I have is a great new necklace.

    • Kimba says

      January 30, 2016 at 3:22 pm

      But you have a new necklace – much better than a snow pic! Post a pic of the necklace and you’re golden!

  4. Kate says

    January 29, 2016 at 3:58 pm

    Margaritas, pizza, and chocolate chip cookies. I’d get snowed in with you guys anytime! You do winter like a New Englander! Bravo!

    • Kimba says

      January 30, 2016 at 3:05 pm

      Hiya Kate! I’ll definitely be bringing the tequila when I see you in March. And I’m sure we can round up some pizza as well.

  5. Sue Kearney (@MagnoliasWest) says

    January 29, 2016 at 12:55 pm

    I’ve seen snow exactly twice since 1994 when I moved to California from NYC. It snowed in Yosemite on Mother’s Day — clearly a mistake. And once I actually drove to the snow and proceeded to look at it through a window from inside. Give me movies about snow, photos of snow, poems about snow. I feel no need to touch it, walk in it, ever again.

    You made me grin. Thanks!

    • Kimba says

      January 30, 2016 at 3:04 pm

      Well Sue, there are plenty of folks – and my son! – who love, love, love the snow. I’ll site my the fire here and toast to all of them! 🙂

  6. Carol Graham says

    January 29, 2016 at 12:18 pm

    Ohhhhh, I miss the Minnesota winters here on the West Coast where our snowfall was 1/4″ this year.

    • Kimba says

      January 30, 2016 at 3:29 pm

      The west coast has had it’s share of crazy weather this year as well – be safe out there!

  7. Lisa Beach says

    January 29, 2016 at 11:10 am

    Too funny, Kim! You took me back to my years growing up in PA & then living in NJ, with all the storm prep involved and the multi-day lock-in after a blizzard. I’m now happily living in Florida, where, as you point out, “you don’t have to shovel the humidity.” 🙂 Great article!

    • Kimba says

      January 30, 2016 at 3:35 pm

      My son went to Penn State and I’m sure as a Pennsylvanian you know that it’s one of the coldest places in the country – yet, he still loved it. It’s all a matter of perspective I suppose. I’ll be down in Florida in Feb to visit family and I’m sure a good warming up of my bones will help my disposition.

  8. Diane Howell Topkis says

    January 29, 2016 at 10:33 am

    We were geared up for about 4 -8″ of snow in the mid-Hudson Valley in NY – but it never showed. Missed us entirely. Not even a flake. We’ve given up on skiing around here this year so the day after the blizzard, we made plans to go to Colorado to ski.

    • Kimba says

      January 30, 2016 at 3:51 pm

      One of my best friends lives in the Hudson Valley area: when we go to visit the husbands and kids go skiing and we’re off to lunch and shopping in Rhinebeck. Gal pals don’t make gal pals ski.

  9. Marquita Herald says

    January 29, 2016 at 10:08 am

    There was a time I used to head to NY and parts north every chance I got – thought I might move to the East Coast one day. I felt pretty comfortable driving in snow, snow chains and all, even had to dig my car out a few times, but never had to deal with an actual snow storm. I think I could have managed it a decade (or 2) ago, but reading about your adventure makes me realize that train has long ago left the station. The biggest thing that happens in January where I live is whale watching season officially begins, which is definitely more my speed these days. Thanks for the inspiration and wake-up call Kimba!

    • Kimba says

      January 30, 2016 at 2:57 pm

      Marty, every time I hear from you it moves me one step closer to moving to your little space in the world. Looking out over the back yard currently covered in snow, I would do anything to instead be watching whales jumping out of the water!

  10. Marcia @ Menopausal Mother says

    January 29, 2016 at 8:29 am

    LOVE this! Sounds exactly like what we do here in SoFlo when preparing for a hurricane!!

    • Kimba says

      January 30, 2016 at 2:48 pm

      I can’t believe I didn’t think of that Marcia! It is a lot like hurricane prep, except the snow hangs on forever…

  11. Leslie Handler says

    January 29, 2016 at 8:21 am

    I feel your pain Kim. I too am a southern gal. If the temp don’t start with a 7,8,or 9, it’s too damn cold!
    You might enjoy my snow shoveling story from the past: http://lesliehandler.com/hello-blogsphere/page/5/ it was never ending.

    Stay warm.

    • Kimba says

      January 30, 2016 at 2:41 pm

      Ha! I love that caveat – temp must start with a 7, 8 or 9. Perfect!

  12. Suzie Cheel says

    January 29, 2016 at 8:09 am

    Kim, yes I feel for you siting her in the warmth of Aussie summer- I know why I live where I do, I love being warm and although there is a romance of snow , I imagine it wears thin and you have to put on so many layers.
    Maybe move to Florida for Winter 🙂

    • Kimba says

      January 30, 2016 at 2:33 pm

      As a kid living in Florida, we kind of made fun of the snow birds who flocked down to our state every winter. I now so get why they wanted to flee the colder climates! I just might have to become a snowbird myself – great suggestion Suzie!

Hello!

Author photo #2 in colorI hope you enjoy your time here and that you come back often. Wondering what makes me tick? This favorite quote from one of the grand dames of writing, Erma Bombeck, might help: Hook 'em with the lead. Hold 'em with laughter. Exit with a quip they won't forget. This seems to be a good overall life goal, don’t you think?

Hello!

Author photo #2 in colorWelcome to The Middle-Aged Cheap Seats,  the blog of Kimba Dalferes: slayer of king salmon, estate sale junkie, sometimes writes books.
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Beaches, Bathrooms, and Books!

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Sahar bathroom picKimba’s books have been called both “beach reads” and “bathroom reads.” She prefers beach reads, but hey, if the size 11 shoe fits…Read More...

Kim Dalferes’ Latest Book…

Crazy Southern Irish Gal Two-Book Bundle

Humor writer Kimberly “Kimba” Dalferes dishes on a wide variety of topics–from days of her youth spent blissfully on the shores of Florida’s beaches to menopause and empty nests–in her nonfiction collection Crazy Southern Irish Gal Two-Book Bundle. In both titles: I Was In Love With a Short Man Once and Magic Fishing Panties, Dalferes’ crazy Southern Irish gal perspective inspires her illustrations of life’s quirky twists and turns. Together, these books offer descriptive and colorful essays on subjects such as getting a tattoo in midlife, unique uses for kitty litter, handling a rabid bat, public speaking gone wrong, and naked hot-tubbing in Vegas. Dalferes skillfully weaves what at first glance may appear to be dissimilar themes into a tapestry that invokes her life’s motto: live out loud, laugh often, and ‘occasionally’ drink tequila. Now available through Amazon Kindle.

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